The perennial runners-up dubbed Neverkusen have broken the mould but have a lot to do to still be top in May
As far as silly misnomers go, "Herbstmeisterschaft" (autumn championship) is on a par with Bild's "Pop-Titan Dieter Bohlen" (Modern Talking's slightly less effeminate member does a poor Simon Cowell impersonation on the German X-Factor) and "Hoth", the snow-monster infested, Tauntaun-killing ice planet from The Empire Strikes Back.
No, this meisterschaft is patently not a real championship of any sorts. If it was, perennial runners-up Leverkusen, the club who would probably manage to botch a one-horse race, could not possibly have won it, of course. And the "autumn" bit is even more misleading, when the last round of matches before the winter break sees temperatures that range from "brrrrr" (-10C) to "sorry, I can't speak because my tongue just fell off" (-15C). Snow covered many pitches despite under-soil heating at the weekend, so the referees brought out orange balls that looked suspiciously like merchandise from the (now sadly defunct) summer holiday section of http://www.liverpoolfc.tv.
The serious broadsheets have for many years refused to acknowledge the existence of the Herbstmeisterschaft thingy altogether. But the popularity of the term among ordinary football folk has forced their hand: these days, everybody reads much into the table at the end of the first half of the season. "Leverkusen crowned, provisionally", wrote Frankfurter Allgemeine Zeitung after Bayer's 3-2 win over Gladbach cemented their position at the top, one point ahead of Schalke. Der Spiegel thought that "Neverkusen" could allow themselves some "title dreams instead of title trauma" for a change and Süddeutsche Zeitung congratulated the side for "breaking their mould" – and not finishing in second place.
The stats say that 67% of autumn champions end up winning the trophy in May, so the Matchday 17 positions do at least offer some vague hint. Neither Stuttgart (champions 2007) nor Wolfsburg (2009) were anywhere near the top at Christmas, however, and last year's first-half hotshots and league leaders Hoffenheim crashed down to seventh when the games resumed.
In Leverkusen they are convinced they have what it takes to go all the way. Their numbers are certainly impressive. Jupp Heynckes' team is the only unbeaten side in all three professional divisions in Germany. They have the best attack (35 goals) and best defence, along with Schalke (13 conceded). Bayer have consistently played the best, most aesthetically pleasing football as well and they have done so despite losing three or four key players to injuries in recent weeks. And their manager, Heynckes, at 64 years of age, has proved himself exactly the sort of relaxed, experienced operator and tactician that his young ensemble of skilled players desperately needed.
Against a resurgent Gladbach side, Leverkusen showed a bit of mettle, too. The visitor's Brazilian defender Dante, who could literally put Marouane Fellaini in the shade with his tremendous afro, gave Borussia a 2-1 lead after the break but Eren Derdiyok equalised before the magnificent Toni Kroos scored his second goal to secure all three points. "If we had lost this lead, the whole league would have slagged us off," said the striker Stefan Kiessling. Sporting director Rudi Völler took heart from the result, too: "This has sent a message to the competition."
Franz Beckenbauer praised Kroos as "the next Michael Ballack" on Sunday but that shouldn't fool anyone – the kid, on loan from Bayern until the summer, really is very good. Kroos, 19, has been the Bundesliga's most impressive individual performer after Bremen's Mesut Ozil; unfortunately for Bayer, he's been so consistently brilliant that Bayern will certainly ask for his return after the World Cup. One should also mention Sami Hyypia's flawless positional play, Kiessling's steep learning curve and the unassuming excellence of captain Simon Rolfes, the unobtrusive beanpole in front of the back four. But first and foremost, Bayer have excelled as a team. Whether they can really rage against the red machine and win their first ever title remains to be seen: Bayern are – for better and for worse – still most people's favourites. But in the meantime, Leverkusen should really enjoy basking in the glory of their imaginary trophy win. They truly deserve it.
